I like consistency and stability, I crave it, but most things in life are just the opposite.

But, lucky for me, there is one thing that is and always will be consistent and stable.

As I have written about previously, I haven’t always had the relationship that I currently have with God. Up until about three years ago, you could say that I was indifferent about God.

Those were… dark times. I don’t think about that period of my life frequently.

As cheesy as it sounds, having a real relationship with God changed my life. In the last three years, I have become more confident and secure in myself and my purpose in life. He has opened so many doors that have led me to Him and His love; something that I didn’t always know the value of. There is power in knowing, really knowing God. His heart for me and you will always be pure and true. Even though I may not always know the purpose of things He puts in front of me, I know it will all make sense in the end. I could go on and on about how good He is, but I’ll get to the point.

2019 was a hard year for me, there’s no question about it. My faith was shaken a few times, and I didn’t give my relationship with God the time it needed. Although if I did, the past year probably wouldn’t have been as rough as it was. My mind was so clouded that I couldn’t even see all the goodness and light that was always right before my eyes. I really neglected God, especially in the second half of last year. I struggled in many areas of my life, but I also learned a lot. I learned about heartbreak, failure, uncertainty, but most importantly I learned that I will never be my best self without God. I know all those trials and tribulations weren’t without purpose, and He will always be there to give me guidance and clarity. Even on the cloudiest of days, He is the sun. The devil works hard, but God works harder. Much harder.

I don’t want a repeat of last year. I want– no, I need this year to be different. So, I made a promise to myself and God that this year I would be more consistent in my relationship with Him. Even when I’m not meeting Him halfway, He meets me where I am. God always goes before me; He knows where I’ll struggle and when I’ll feel weak. In those times, He brings me strength. I want to experience more of Him and grow in my faith this year. My relationship with God has helped me get through some hard times in the last few years, and I want to know more of His plans for me.

I want this year to be one of peace and clarity. Even though I don’t know all the plans for my future, I want to have the confidence in my God to go into it blindly, knowing that He will never steer me wrong. God has given me so many good things and blessings that have led me here, including my best friend. I wouldn’t be where I am now without her everlasting love and support, and I am so grateful that He gave me her.

I hope that everyone reading this goes into this new year with a clear mind and an open heart. The new year always brings so many new opportunities to grow and learn more about yourself. You’ll never know how many doors will be opened for you if you take chances and move outside of your comfort zone. God will lead you in the right direction and He will catch you if you fall. With Him, you never need to worry.

I’ll leave you with this: Even though we may be entering a new decade, God will always remain the same. He is the one constant, the one stable thing that we can always count on. When I crave consistency and stability, I turn to God. I hope you find the same peace in Him as I do.

Happy New Year, my beautiful friends.

Love, emily

SOTP: After much thought, I decided to go with a song that brings me peace when I feel unsteady: “Highlands (Song of Ascent)” by Hillsong UNITED. This song reminds us that no matter what we are dealing with, God is always bigger than our demons.

No less God within the shadows, no less faithful when the night leads me astray

‘Cause You’re the heaven where my heart is, in the highlands and the heartache all the same